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I can understand that, but how would they know? We do not live in small, isolated villages where everyone has their nose in everyone else’s business. We are mobile. We grow up in 1 or 2 different towns, cities or suburbs and usually go away to college in a 3rd place, then after graduating move for a 4 time for work. So how would any boyfriend/girlfriend know our “past”?

“Now personally this is how I feel from a level above that primal feeling.
Commitment to a man predominately means, “I will only have sex with you for the rest of my life” Why should I stop having sex with other women for someone who has sex with 20-40 people? I feel like I would be partaking in a bad deal.”

It may be a bad deal. But according to all statistics, MOST men and women are not having sex with 20-40 people by the time they settle down with their first spouse. There is no use getting all worked up over a scenario that is not very likely to take place.

ldl says:
March 2, 2013 at 5:24 pm
“So how would any boyfriend/girlfriend know our “past”?”

It usually outs itself given enough time. They start talking about the guys they used to date in a short period of time. Interpolation can be valid. The last girl I was dating, we were hanging out at a bar. She says “I’ve gotten so much ass here.” Yep, that’s sex pos for you. That’s what men are dealing with.

Statistics in this area are bullshit. The truth is that it’s a very difficult problem to know the true numbers. I argue that most self admitted sex positive feminists have high numbers. I don’t know how promiscuous people are. I’m sure I suffer from an apex fallacy of some sort. I tend to date worldly aggressive women (and I need to stop). Who knows what the average is.

Lele says:
March 2, 2013 at 6:05 pm
@Morgasm

Have you ever heard the saying: “The past can come back to haunt you at any time.”?

We don’t live in small villages any more, but we live interconnected lives, and gossip travels fast.

I’ve also read anecdotes of old friends spilling the beans after getting drunk at a party, or a man overhearing a conversation between his wife and an old friend of hers about their younger years, or other creative ways for shit to happen.